Each and every day, good people do silly things. Too often, we allow ourselves to be ignorant about the language we use. Many times we don't realize that tolerance and acceptance can be shown through our word choice.
I have very fair skin, blonde hair and am very tall. These are qualities that I am told many people aspire to have. Instead of embracing these natural qualities that make me who I am, I often let others use language that taught me to feel uncomfortable about myself. I began to describe myself with words such as "albino" "pale" "oger" "giant". I even blamed goofy mistakes on my hair color and often apologized for my "blonde moments".
It has taken me a long time to realize that these terms are not okay. While there are plenty of words out there that can be more harmful, the words mentioned above should not be accepted. Albinism is a congenital disorder that many people live with and referring to others or yourself as an "Albino" is intolerant.
Using negative terms like "pale" and "pasty" to describe yourself or others only allows other people feel that these terms are acceptable.
I believe that one of the secrets to achieving happiness is self acceptance. I wish that I could have accepted myself many many years ago instead of trying to change who I was in order to fit the standards that I thought society held for me.
I look at old photos of myself from times when I was the least comfortable in my own skin. I bleached my already light blonde hair, I harmed my skin by tanning, I thought that I was too tall or weighed too much. When I look at these images of myself, I wish that I would have known how beautiful I truly was.
Beauty is not everything, but it should not be taboo for us to think that we are beautiful the way that we are.
In order for change to start, it has to start with you. Stop using words that are hurtful (to yourself and others) and make an effort every day to use more inclusive language. Utilize your words to uplift those around you.
Sarah,
ReplyDeleteThank you for commenting on my blog. Funny how God talks to us through the smallest of things, like your blog today. I'm so guilty of those things you talked about. I already had reddish blond hair and started bleaching it lighter all these years. I never tanned in my life but tried and failed with many sun burns thinking just maybe that one time it would happen. I think I have been dieting all my adult life. The things God has helped me with in the past months are showing me that I not only need to take care of the body he gave me, but the soul. I have stopped bleaching my hAir and on my fifth month of roots now showing, but my hair is getting healthy, slowly because it's so long, but healthy. I stay out of the sun as much as possible and see my dermatologist several times a year. I take better care of my skin and try to stay healthy. I try to eat better and watch what and how much. I walk four miles day, five days a week and I go to swim class three times a week. It has taken me soon 59 years to stop being in control and let God take the wheel of my health. He reminds me of that each time I try to do it myself. Thank you for your post today.
Betty